Addiction - HEROIN - Coming-off-heroin

Coming off heroin

Coming off heroin

Nicola*, 25, tells us how she got her life back on track after becoming addicted to heroin.

I became addicted to heroin when I was 17. I discovered that my boyfriend was a user when I found needles in his pockets. I was mad with him at first, but I didn't want us to split up because I thought I loved him.

I wasn't planning on taking it, but because nothing bad had happened to him I didn't think it was dangerous. So, I asked him a couple of times if I could try it, but he always said no. One night, however, when he was really high, I asked him again and he gave me a hit. It made me really sick but I wanted to try it again, so kept on using it. Within two months I developed a habit.

To pay for my addiction I sold furniture, jewellery and anything else that would bring in some extra cash. My habit got so bad that I even worked as a prostitute for three months. I'd come home every night and cry in the bath, scrubbing myself till I bled.

One day my leg became sore after shooting up in my groin. I went to the hospital and was told that I had a blood clot. My gran was really worried and asked me to live with her so she could look after me - I didn't want to disappoint her so I agreed. The doctors prescribed me with dihydrocodeine to help wean me off heroin. I was offered methadone, the stronger drug, but refused it. It was a lot harder to stay clean with dihydrocodeine, but I managed with the help of my gran.

I owe my life to her because I don't think I could have gone through my recovery without her support. Sadly, she passed away last year due to cancer, but I will always remember what she did for me. I used to tell her how much I appreciated her help and she'd say, "Nicola, you did it on your own, I just gave you a little push".

"It's been a slow and painful process but I'm really proud of what I've achieved so far - I went off the rails, but I'm happy to say that I've nearly got myself together."

Eight months after I came off drugs I went back to hospital with a sore chest. I was horrified when the doctors told me I had bacteria in my heart valve, kidney failure, blood poisoning and blood clots in my lungs and legs.

My health deteriorated very quickly. I 'technically' died three times in intensive care and had to stay in hospital for three-and-a-half months. I eventually recovered, but I'm still suffering. I get pains in my chest, which the doctors tell me will never go away. Apparently, my body was so reliant on heroin that even when I stopped using it continued to rot away my insides.

But my life has completely changed since I came off heroin. I've got a new boyfriend - who's never touched heroin - and we're really happy. We have a two-year-old daughter and are planning on getting married soon. My boyfriend has a good job and I've recently starting working as an administrator after getting my HNC.

Throughout my recovery food has been a big comfort to me, so I've put on a lot of weight. I'm now very self-conscious about my appearance, so don't go out much - I worry about people judging me. I know I have to do something about it so I'm trying to lose a few pounds; my family are my comfort now, not junk food.

It's been a slow and painful process but I'm really proud of what I've achieved so far - I went off the rails, but I'm happy to say that I've nearly got myself together. In a few months I'm hoping to come off dihydrocodeine and then I'll be completely free of drugs for good.

* Details have been changed to protect her identity.

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The Have I Got A Problem website is a free online resource to help people better understand any issues or concerns they may have about mental health or addiction. The website includes resources specifically focused to; general Mental Health, Depression, Stress, Anxiety, Insecurities, Self-harm Schizophrenia, Bipolar, Anger Management, Eating Disorders, Coping, general Addiction, Alcohol, Smoking, Gambling, Drugs, Cocaine, Heroin, Marijuana (Cannabis) Ecstasy, PCP, Mephedrone, Ketamine & Crystal Meth.

The site was created to give the public information to help them understand mental health and addiction issues and to assist people in making better informed decisions about their life and personal choices.

www.haveigotaproblem.com was created and is run by 'Advising Communities’, which is a UK registered charity (Charity No. 1061055)

Quotes

"I know that a lot of people are opposed to Methadone and that is ok, but for some people it can be a great blessing. I am one of those people. I still miss Heroin, I dream about Heroin...and I know that if not for Methadone, I would have a needle in my ve"

Leslie

"I want to stop myself from doing drugs before it's too late. I want to get clean and turn my life around before I start taking harder drugs."

Mia-louise

"I had not taken a bath in a year or changed my clothes except to stick a needle every hour in the fibrous grey flesh of heroin addiction."

Claire

"I’ve done some awful things to keep my habit going. I’ve stole from everyone in my family and every place I’ve worked. I’ve literally wrecked everyone’s life that is close to me. It didn’t matter how I got money as long as I got it, I’d just deal with the"

Anon

"My brother was a charismatic, athletic, loyal, outgoing guy with a heart of gold; since he started using heroin he has lost himself. He's stolen from friends, family, neighbors, strangers.. He wakes up in the morning, full of self loathing and worries abo"

Taylor

"The only life I had in me was for that, and when I did not have that I had only deep, deep depression. A darkness would straightaway engulf me and leave me only what could alleviate my pain - heroin."

James

"I don't miss the fact that now when my lips move it is more than likely I am actually telling the truth."

Jane S

"I don't miss the fear that arose when I'm driving my car every time a police car hovers into view."

Steven

"My lowest point was when I realised I was stealing money from my daughters Christmas presents to fund my habit."

P. Gomez

"That's what made me think of stopping my drug habits - My Blood pressure spiked at 200/110 last week during a Panic Attack."

Maria

"Anyone being faced with the reality that their addiction needs to be conquered and their life will change is going to be scared."

Fatima

"You need to realize that the little voice in your head telling you to use is your own."

Maya

"Find out why you use, find out your triggers, and take it day by day. Any day clean is better than any day you’ve been high."

Ivan

"My goal in life wasn't living...it was getting high. I was falling in a downward spiral towards a point of no return"

John

"I ended up homeless and on the streets, living and sleeping in a cardboard box, begging and struggling to find ways to get my next meal."

Ben

"Now I see how important it is for me to be in control of every part of me. Today my body is being controlled by me. I am in the driver’s seat, and I’m driving with happiness."

Nathan

"Little did I know that my mom was upstairs crying every night that I came home late, crying because she was scared for my survival."

Nick

"Heroin overdose is a bad term as it implies there is a safe dose. There is no safe dose, only a lethal dose."

Mann Spitler

"I got in by tiny little steps, thousands of these little decisions leading incrementally to my heroin addiction."

Ebadaah

"I was being very selfish because I was thinking I was not hurting anyone but myself by using heroine, but this was the farthest thing from the truth."

Amanda

"I remember driving down the highway with a friend one day. He turned to me and said ‘do you realize what we are doinng? We are ruining our lives."

Anonymous

"I really needed to go to jail, it was the kick up the arse I needed to stop doing heroin."

Polly

"I became so dependent on heroin that I could barely get up to get my drugs to make me feel better."

Chickie

"The most important thing I lost was the respect and trust of my family. I have never felt a feeling worse than that."

Rachel

"I am lying in bed shaking, my legs aching. My eyes are sore, I’m nauseous, muscles paining and I’m constantly sneezing."

Christian

"Heroin is evil and will bring you down. There is no future for the heroin user. Well done for kicking it."

Mitchell

"Sometimes I wish my mind would just shut up when I'm clean and let me stay clean, but it just wants me so bad to use."

Taylor

"Heroin is not cool and it didn't make me any cooler, I just looked like a stupid little junkie in everyone's eyes except my own."

Samantha

"Then one day I took the jump and asked for my first hit, this was the biggest mistake of my life."

Jordan

"The brain doesn't heal over night. However the less you use the less and less you crave it, until finally you barely ever think about it and sobriety finally makes sense. It took me about 6 months of slips before I finally realized that the drugs were not"

Michael

"When I was on heroin, I had dark circles under my eyes. My skin was like a yellowish color. I looked sick, physically ill. I overdosed four times. You never know if you're going to overdose, because you never know what you're getting."

Charity

"One day I overdosed and ended up in the hospital. That scared me like nothing had before. I saw that I really didn't have control over my drug use, and if I didn't do something, it could kill me."

Deon

"It is hard to be the loved one of a heroin user in today's political climate. Nowhere is this seen so clearly as when a heroin user dies suddenly"

Dr M

"It is harder to deal with the sudden death of a loved one than a death that gives warning"

Dr M

"In the end, he told us that he’d had a problem with heroin for almost 10 years, since he was 20. He asked for our help"

Robert and Cassie

"Working helped him a lot. It kept him busy and occupied. Not seeing people that he used to see was really important"

Robert and Cassie

"I felt so guilty that I’d let Adam get into this situation in the first place. I kept thinking about what would help Adam. At the time I couldn’t see that maybe we should get some help too."

Robert and Cassie

"When I realized how serious my son’s opiate addiction was, I wanted to “fix it”. "

Renee

"Treat them like adults, especially if they are one. You can’t be there every minute of the day to stop them making bad decisions, so don’t try to be"

Dr Michael Pantalon

"Being a junkie is hard work. It is a 24 hour per day, 7 day per week job"

Dr M

"I was going through counseling and I told my therapist about all the lying and using behind my parents back"

Mindy

"To pay for my addiction I sold furniture, jewellery and anything else that would bring in some extra cash. My habit got so bad that I even worked as a prostitute for three months."

"Nicola"

"My health deteriorated very quickly. I 'technically' died three times in intensive care"

"Nicola"

"It's been a slow and painful process but I'm really proud of what I've achieved so far"

"Nicola"

"The expectations were different than what I was used to. They weren’t just focused on your grades. They were focused on your sobriety, too"

Mindy

"Do I miss it? After 8 years clean. I still have using dreams, if that's what you mean. Would I ever go near it? Not on your ******* life."

Duke

"Who I was at work and socially was my alter ego. I was pretending to give a sh*t about life because I needed and wanted my heroin supply to be constant."

Laura

"As all heroin addicts know, the next smoke or shoot is always the last one."

Eric

"Today is my day 6 clean, but as I type this now I know failure is only one phone call away. Will I make that call today? I don't know, but if I do, I have only myself to blame. I know my addiction is my fault, I know I have only me to blame for it, and I "

Henry

"I never considered myself an addict, the people who lost control. I swore I would never be one of them. Then it happened, once turned into twice and twice turned thrice and once was too many but a thousand was never enough."

Paula

"Education and employment is the key to staying clean I feel, a new focus in life is a good start but there’s plenty of other stuff needed to be drug free long term."

Brian

"It was now 3 weeks since I got high that first time. By now I'm getting high everyday, I'm lying to people about getting high and I'm sleeping with my dealer for free drugs. And I still don't see the problem. Heroin just blinds you. All I can see is the p"

Megan

"Hopefully today I'll stay clean. Not sure about tomorrow."

Ingrid

"I eneded up trying to cash a stolen check and got arrested. It was the best thing that could have happened to me. I've been straight for 34 days now. Its hard everyday is a struggle but I'm taking it one day at a time."

Kelsey

"I have seen many die, but when you shoot up you forget all these things."

Tomas

"I was raped, beaten, mugged, robbed, arrested, homeless, sick and desperate. I knew that nobody could have a lifestyle like that very long and I knew that death was imminent. If anything, death was better than a life as a junkie."

Alison

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Be truthful and sincere with your addiction

Heroin addiction can play tricks to addicts mind. With its dependency ratio being so high, you have to be honest about the depth of you...

Soothe your inner mind

You have to realise that your mind has been used to taking in heroin at regular intervals, so you will have to work against your minds ...

Take each day as it comes for quitting addiction

If you tell yourself that you would be quitting for good that could turn out to be a huge psychological block which would be hard to fi...

Quit your way

Don’t rely on what other people have to say about your addiction. Everything is individual. You could quit cold turkey or even get so...

Erase all of your dealers' phone numbers

You probably have their numbers memorized, but after a few months, you will forget them....

Take a trip somewhere

Anywhere. A change of setting will help you forget about your old routine (spending your whole day trying to find some money for heroin...

Clean yourself through exercise

Exercise helps the body excrete all the junk inside and can regulate the metabolism....

Remember why you are quitting

Make a list of things you've lost to heroin and things you want back. Refer to this list whenever you have the urge to use....

Make further plans after quitting

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Find your support network

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Avoid the places of your old life

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Keep track of your mental health

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Products that will help

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Learn All You Can

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Pay attention to the addict’s cycle

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Addiction is a disease

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Other people never know

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Don’t blame yourself!

As a loved one of an addict, the addiction is not your fault. Your job is to guide your addict to sobriety, not to blame yourself or an...

Enabling

Look it up! Don’t be the one that’s enabling your addict. You’d be holding them back from the recovery process....

Don’t lose hope!

“As long as he or she is breathing, there is hope” – take that to heart. It’s never too late to help your loved one....

It's just easier

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Look at the list of people who have been destroyed, even killed, by drugs

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Keep a calendar hanging on the wall

On your calendar write, 'Day 1, Day 2, Day 3, Day 4, Day 5, Day 6, Day 7, all the way to Day 40, yet placing more emphasis on making it...

Closely examine what has made you feel valuable in the past

You are a valuable person, and it will be easier for you to find it out if you think about what you were doing when you were clean....

Try the suboxone/subutex approach

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Don't give up becasue you had a bad day

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Don't beat yourself up

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More Tips & Hints

Coming off heroin

Downloads

Web Resources

Quotes

Tips & Hints

Learn healthy ways to cope with problems

Don’t let relapse keep you down

Seek support from your family

No more secrets

Regain Power

Be truthful and sincere with your addiction

Soothe your inner mind

Take each day as it comes for quitting addiction

Quit your way

Erase all of your dealers' phone numbers

Take a trip somewhere

Clean yourself through exercise

Remember why you are quitting

Make further plans after quitting

Find your support network

Avoid the places of your old life

Keep track of your mental health

Products that will help

Learn All You Can

Pay attention to the addict’s cycle

Addiction is a disease

Other people never know

Don’t blame yourself!

Enabling

Don’t lose hope!

It's just easier

Look at the list of people who have been destroyed, even killed, by drugs

Keep a calendar hanging on the wall

Closely examine what has made you feel valuable in the past

Try the suboxone/subutex approach

Don't give up becasue you had a bad day

Don't beat yourself up

Try your best not to give in to cravings

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