How to Prevent Insecurity in Children


Insecurity in children can be prevented if you know what to do or not do. Many kids suffer from childhood insecurity as a result of neglect in the home or a parent's emotional distance. This can lead to what psychologists call reactive attachment disorder. As a result, the child may have difficulties forming meaningful relationships. Sometimes the parents may or may not know that what they're doing is the reason for insecurity in their kids.


  1. Find the root cause of any insecurity issues your child is experiencing. Sometimes the child has no idea that he or she is insecure. She may be acting out with a bad attitude and poor behaviour, but not know why. The parents may be in the dark as to why themselves. Examine why the child might feel angry or uncared for. Change your own schedule to spend more time with the child.
  2. Insecure children may also act out by being loudmouths and braggarts or even bullies to cover up their insecurity. On the other hand, insecure kids are also known to hide from the crowd and be loners.
  3. Analyze the home atmosphere. If it's chaotic and without structure, it will create childhood insecurity. A home without stability is bound to make kids insecure. You need to set rules, routine, limits and boundaries. Try to be firm but not rigid in setting schedules and expectations. This is done in a loving way, not as a dictator without the child having any say at all. Flexibility is good as long as you're not too permissive. Discipline with love calmly, not out of anger or frustration.
  4. Do not be overly negative about the child or his performance. All children want their parents to be proud of them and praise them. Don't insult a child's character or demean him. What a parent says and how he says it can cause a child to become insecure.
  5. Keep expectations realistic, or the child may see them as conditions placed on your love. In other words, she may think you only love her if she lives up to your expectations. Show the child unconditional love so that he feels loved and accepted even if he doesn't make the football team.
  6. Be positive about accomplishments. If a child does his best and his best is never good enough this can certainly create childhood insecurity. Speak words of encouragement. Don't just assume he knows how you feel.
  7. Monitor closely your child's progress in school. Poor grades can be a sign of low self-esteem and insecurity problems.
  8. Assign your child responsibilities and age-appropriate chores. Help him build confidence by rewarding him when chores are completed in a timely manner. Look for responsibilities around the home that he would be interested in doing.

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"Most insecurity people aren’t even aware of what they are. The habits are automatic and subconscious."


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