How-to-stop-worrying.-Challenge-anxious-thoughts

How to stop worrying. Challenge anxious thoughts

If you suffer from chronic anxiety and worries, chances are you look at the world in ways that make it seem more dangerous than it really is. For example, you may overestimate the possibility that things will turn out badly, jump immediately to worst-case scenarios, or treat every negative thought as if it were fact. You may also discredit your own ability to handle life’s problems, assuming you will fall apart at the first sign of trouble. These irrational, pessimistic attitudes are known as cognitive distortions.

Although cognitive distortions are not based on reality, they are not easy to give up. Often, they are part of a lifelong pattern of thinking that is become so automatic you are not even completely aware of it. In order to break these bad thinking habits and stop the worry and anxiety they bring, you must retrain your brain.

Start by identifying the frightening thought, being as detailed as possible about what scares or worries you. Then, instead of viewing your thoughts as facts, treat them as hypotheses you are testing out. As you examine and challenge your worries and fears, you will develop a more balanced perspective.

Stop worry by questioning the worried thought:

What is the evidence that the thought is true? That it is not true?
Is there a more positive, realistic way of looking at the situation?
What is the probability that what I am scared of will actually happen?
If the probability is low, what are some more likely outcomes?
Is the thought helpful? How will worrying about it help me and how will it hurt me?
What would I say to a friend who had this worry?

Cognitive Distortions that Add to Anxiety, Worry, and Stress

All-or-nothing thinking - Looking at things in black-or-white categories, with no middle ground. “If I fall short of perfection, I am a total failure.”

Overgeneralization - Generalizing from a single negative experience, expecting it to hold true forever. “I did not get hired for the job. I will never get any job.”

The mental filter - Focusing on the negatives while filtering out all the positives. Noticing the one thing that went wrong, rather than all the things that went right.

Diminishing the positive - Coming up with reasons why positive events do not count. “I did well on the presentation, but that was just dumb luck.”

Jumping to conclusions - Making negative interpretations without actual evidence. You act like a mind reader, “I can tell she secretly hates me.” Or a fortune teller, “I just know something terrible is going to happen.”

Catastrophizing - Expecting the worst-case scenario to happen. “The pilot said we are in for some turbulence. The plane is going to crash!”

Emotional reasoning - Believing that the way you feel reflects reality. “I feel frightened right now. That must mean I am in real physical danger.”

'Shoulds’ and ‘should-nots’ - Holding yourself to a strict list of what you should and should not do and beating yourself up if you break any of the rules

Labeling - Labeling yourself based on mistakes and perceived shortcomings. “I am a failure; an idiot; a loser.”

Personalization - Assuming responsibility for things that are outside your control. “It is my fault my son got in an accident. I should have warned him to drive carefully in the rain.

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Quotes

"Each time you refuse to do something, your mind and body will get used to the situation and your reactions will weaken. If you want your life back you have to live it!"

Anonymous

"As my symptoms got worse and my panic attacks more frequent, I became frustrated, withdrawn, and depressed. Before it was all over it nearly cost me my job, my marriage, my friends, and my sanity."

Bill Burniece

"I remember getting so nervous that I would have to leave class and go to the counselor’s office."

Stacy Gregg

"Feeling intense shame and a nagging fear that people would think my attacks were all in my head, I decided to hide my symptoms from even my closest friends and family."

Holly Kammier

"I still felt horrible and had intrusive thoughts often, but I would always play with them in my head by changing them into funny scenes."

Linda

"The worst part was I never knew when or where the next panic attack would occur."

Bill Burniece

"One thing I have learned about anxiety is that if you aren’t vigilant it will take over your life."

Korol

"The rewards of trying, whether I succeed or not, are always better than letting my worries run my life."

Janine

"I find that some of my anxiety is very "situational". In those situations I have to keep mentally calm and try to stop my mind running away with itself."

Mirty

"Don't want to go to bed because I don't want to get up."

Rachael

"My anxiety and voices makes it impossible for me to stand university. I tried going to real uni and had to go to the online program because I couldn't stand it."

Niniane

"I tried relying on medication alone to battle my anxiety and that did not work. I had to get to the heart of the matter and then work through it."

Raina

"At the root of my anxiety was a lot of fear because of unresolved issues from my past so i had to address them."

Raina

"I just want to be open and active, and not care what people think, but it seems like the more I try, the more I end up failing."

Anonymous

"Weird breathing as if I am breathing but something is restricting the oxygen, it never feels like my brain is refreshed or an ice cold blast to my chest."

Chris

"It is the trouble that never comes that causes the loss of sleep."

Austin

"I was wondering, though, does anyone relate to me, or understand me, when I say sometimes I just worry that this is me. That my dark times, my worries, my anxious feelings, my low moods, is all just me, that is just part of life, and so there is nothing t"

Harry

"It can get better and I also had a few good, relatively anxiety free years."

Annie

"Accept that illness makes your anxiety worse and that once you are feeling better you will continue along the path to recovery."

Jane

"I’m in a bad place at the moment, and although I don’t believe things will ever change, they will. Nothing stays the same forever."

David

"Talking is very important, it takes so much pressure away even if it doesn’t feel like at first."

Anonymous

"I try to relax and not worry about these things, but sometimes the anxiety can become overwhelming and I end up losing the plot."

Matt

"I think I've had the opposite thing with work, as generally it gives me something else to think about other than anxiety. I'm much worse if I have nothing to do."

Albert

"I find work makes my anxiety worse in a couple of ways. Firstly, because when I'm at work I am away from my home which is "safe" and I feel scared that something bad may happen."

Robert

"I get into a job and for the first few months its fine, then I start getting very anxious - usually about colleagues so want to move on and see if it's better elsewhere."

Mary

"Respect us for coping with such a difficult and life changing experience. Learn from us."

"Learning to accept who we are is the first step to recovery, trying to rid ourselves of discomfort and distress only serves to increase it."

Megan

"Anxiety never stops you doing anything. That is always your choice! I chose to live my life and take it with me."

Willy

"A lot of anxiety and fear is down to habits and beliefs, thankfully these can be changed, a new attitude and outlook is key."

Peter

"When you do something new and you did not feel too great, see it as a victory that you did it and not a failure that it didn't go too well."

Antonio

"With anxiety we have far more imaginary worries than real ones."

Ron

"If anxiety tried to stop me doing something, I would do it even more to show it who was in charge."

Gemma

"Don’t keep endlessly looking for a cure to your anxiety, create one by no longer letting it rule what you do and don’t do."

Anonymous

"Sometimes, anxiety is like quicksand, the harder we struggle to escape, the deeper we sink."

Rose Mary

"The thing about anxiety is, it can take on a life of its own. Everything becomes a potential crisis. The unthinkable has happened. So around every corner, there's the next possible disaster."

Linda Andrews, MD

"If it's not one thing, it's another. You're procrastinating to the point that you're almost afraid to take a step. You're so nervous about going to your child's school to talk to the teacher, you just don't go -- you miss the appointment."

Ross

"Separate out the real risks and dangers that a situation presents and those your imagination is making worse"

Ross

"You may be on autopilot for several weeks. If you're depressed, that can complicate things. In the case of divorce, it may take months to years to really get back to yourself."

Ross

"If you're doing well in one aspect of your life -- in your work or your relationships -- you're probably on your way. Fear and anxiety are no longer running your life."

Ross

"Many people have a sense of impending disaster, and think they're going to faint, lose control or even die. You need to tell yourself that this is not going to happen and the symptoms you're experiencing are caused by anxiety"

Prof Paul Salkovskis

"I was just always panicking. Every time I did anything I was thinking "what happens if this ends in total disaster?""

Neville

"The difficulty comes in learning to tone down that automatic response -- to think, 'How serious is the danger? How likely is the threat?"

Linda Andrews, MD

"The most important thing: to realize when you've done everything you can, that you need to move forward"

Ross

"When things are bad, there is a legitimate reason to feel bad. But if you don't deal with it, you're going to lose more than just a job"

Linda Andrews, MD

"After all the emotional trauma, friends lost, relationships ruined, job lost, and not finishing my degree, I decided I never wanted to go through anything like that again"

Amanda

"No one should have to feel shamed for a biochemical imbalance of any sort."

Amanda

More Send us your Quotes

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Remember: There is no miracle cure
The best way to help yourself is not to spend every day trying to rid yourself of how you are feeling, but to be willing to work with t...
The best way to help yourself is not to spend every day trying to rid yourself of how you are feeling, but to be willing to work with the feelings you have. This is the way to give your mind and body a break. Worrying and fighting your feelings and thoughts just adds to those feelings of anxiety and panic, and keeps you caught in a vicious cycle. Nothing is achieved overnight, but with knowledge comes less worrying and this helps give your mind and body the time and space it needs to recover. You must realise that you have to let recovery come to you, and not spend hours each day chasing it.
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